Q. I consider myself overall to be a "good girl". I have high respect and confidence about myself that humbles me; I'm kind to others but not a pushover; ambitious, fun, has a set of goals and hobbies; and I'm not easy but can be flirty and mannered and polite. As much as I am enjoying my single life, lately I've been jaded by men. I FEEL as if all guys are the same: some are soo interested in you and will do anything to be near you for one minute and the next, they don't like you; some will lie and believe they can get away with it; some just waste your time for attention bc they're either bored or lonely; and some will only be nice to you because they just want that one thing.
I just read "why men marry bitches" and it's soo empowering and i just realized that I have been th nice girl. And although that is a good atribute, it doesn't get you far. Reading that book has made me realize, women need to find their inner 8 yr old. At that age, boys were never a priority: it was all about getting good grades, reading my favorite books, excited to play my favorite sport during recess, or spending time with the girls playing/talking about barbies. I didn't care what people thought and I always put myself first. When a boy was mean to me, i was mean back; if he made fun of my barbies, i made fun of his trucks; if he insulted me, i insulted him back...if he did anything that was completely disrespectful, I completely ignored him and told him straight up to "never talk to me again bc he was a meanie". If he asked to borrow something and promised he'd give it back, I didn't believe him, called him a liar and didn't trust him. Now entering my mid 20s I look at women and realize how much we've changed from then. Everything is "male centered" - This book inspired me to be my 8 yr old self again: put myself first, be interested in my favorite sports/interests and if a guy ever disrespects me, I cut him off. Here's the thing where I'm torn: I don't want to "change" myself and be someone I'm not although, the book does give women the confidence to OPPOSE and OPENLY DISAGREE w. whatever a guy says or does. Growing up in an old fashioned environment, i've been raised to be "ladylike"...so maybe that's my problem. Maybe I can still be a "good girl" but have more confidence to say "no, I'm still gonna do what I want anyway no matter how much you disagree." and to stick w. your morals. Then I get confused bc this book says the truth how men will always play games or test out women...and I'm tired of games already. I thought if a guy was meant for you, it would all be natural and there wouldn't be game playing. I dated this guy (maybe age has to do alot w. it, he was 21). We went out (took me to dinner) and after that, he didn't call. My co-worker asked him and he said, "if she's really interested, she'd call me". He had a point BUT if he was really man and interested, he would've asked me to hang out again...he also started acting arrogant. It confused me bc I dated someone 5 yrs older when I was 21, he did just that. He called and initiated another meeting - no BS. I sound confused....thoughts?
I just read "why men marry bitches" and it's soo empowering and i just realized that I have been th nice girl. And although that is a good atribute, it doesn't get you far. Reading that book has made me realize, women need to find their inner 8 yr old. At that age, boys were never a priority: it was all about getting good grades, reading my favorite books, excited to play my favorite sport during recess, or spending time with the girls playing/talking about barbies. I didn't care what people thought and I always put myself first. When a boy was mean to me, i was mean back; if he made fun of my barbies, i made fun of his trucks; if he insulted me, i insulted him back...if he did anything that was completely disrespectful, I completely ignored him and told him straight up to "never talk to me again bc he was a meanie". If he asked to borrow something and promised he'd give it back, I didn't believe him, called him a liar and didn't trust him. Now entering my mid 20s I look at women and realize how much we've changed from then. Everything is "male centered" - This book inspired me to be my 8 yr old self again: put myself first, be interested in my favorite sports/interests and if a guy ever disrespects me, I cut him off. Here's the thing where I'm torn: I don't want to "change" myself and be someone I'm not although, the book does give women the confidence to OPPOSE and OPENLY DISAGREE w. whatever a guy says or does. Growing up in an old fashioned environment, i've been raised to be "ladylike"...so maybe that's my problem. Maybe I can still be a "good girl" but have more confidence to say "no, I'm still gonna do what I want anyway no matter how much you disagree." and to stick w. your morals. Then I get confused bc this book says the truth how men will always play games or test out women...and I'm tired of games already. I thought if a guy was meant for you, it would all be natural and there wouldn't be game playing. I dated this guy (maybe age has to do alot w. it, he was 21). We went out (took me to dinner) and after that, he didn't call. My co-worker asked him and he said, "if she's really interested, she'd call me". He had a point BUT if he was really man and interested, he would've asked me to hang out again...he also started acting arrogant. It confused me bc I dated someone 5 yrs older when I was 21, he did just that. He called and initiated another meeting - no BS. I sound confused....thoughts?
A. Hello Helloooo Nurse.
You've posted variants of this post, more times than I've had hot dinners last month. =0)
I'm 'Old school' like yourself (but older) I understand what you're saying in your first paragraph & commend your parents & you for the line >>Growing up in an old fashioned environment, i've been raised to be "ladylike<< (what do your parents think of today's society)?, but I think you need to blame some of it on the demise of family values down the generations, peer pressure, society, sexual equality, the 'Sisterhood' the ladette culture etc-etc. I see young+ girls openly urinating or engaging in sex acts in the park at the bottom of my garden, in shop doorways etc (I think you get the picture) & this is in daylight, then there's the fighting, getting pi$$3d & puking everywhere - - - it is known that more females than males are arrested for drunk & disorderly conduct these days, they seem to have no shame.
I could go on - - but - -.
Perhaps this book you read should be introduced into the school curriculum for girls. (now awaiting a visit from the sexual equality board) but then that would be shot to hell, when parents dress their little 4yr old girls up sexually with playboy branded outfits & the like, then would up in arms complain if they attracted the attention of the local perv or where sexually active. Anyway - - back to your posting - - -
>>I FEEL as if all guys are the same<< Same could be said for women, but no we're NOT - - are we?.
>>some are soo interested in you and will do anything to be near you for one minute and the next, they don't like you;<< Yes, that is about 60% true, with others it's called the 'thrill of the chase', yes we will work hard to get you, then when we do - - - some will 'relax' so to speak & feel we don't need to try so hard.
>>some will only be nice to you because they just want that one thing.<< Players are like that, can spend months working on a 'mark' if it's an advantage, (money, sex, power)
>>some will lie and believe they can get away with it;<< (That also goes both ways) But then isn't that down to - - Tolerance, (letting them get away with little lies) - -Stupidity, (allowing the lies to escalate without check, or he/she can change) or - - Low self esteem - - (but "he/she loves me really, that's what love is')
>>some just waste your time for attention bc they're either bored or lonely;<< True! But again - Both sexes are guilty of this.
As for your headline - - >>Do nice girls finish last? And do men really like b*tches?<< I & many others could 'ASK' the same thing. There are plenty of women who've broken a good mans heart or family up (sometimes abandoning the kids too) due to their actions. Men (rich & poor) who've worshiped the ground, treated them nice, only for them to go of with the local tattooed biker or the likes.
My ex (Claire) of 6yrs (I' knew her for many years earlier) while with me, kept her options open & started a relationship with an abusive drug taking ex con (arson & burglary) who still robs people & (allegedly) had/has a unhealthy interest in children because - she said - WAIT FOR IT - - "he can change, he deserves a second chance" (yes she enjoyed telling me & rubbing my nose in it), Karma though - - within a month of us parting, she was pregnant, engaged & married in that order, let herself go,gave up her law degree courses, then lost her job in a big law firm, unhappy in an abusive marriage, struggling to keep a roof over her head, self esteem back to square one etc. Believe it or not though, I still love her & worry about her (& daughter) - - but - - hey-ho.
But Yes! there are good people with morals & standards out there for us Nurse, (a bit like virgins - eh)? =0) - We - - - - - just - have to - - keep looking.
Best wishes.
You've posted variants of this post, more times than I've had hot dinners last month. =0)
I'm 'Old school' like yourself (but older) I understand what you're saying in your first paragraph & commend your parents & you for the line >>Growing up in an old fashioned environment, i've been raised to be "ladylike<< (what do your parents think of today's society)?, but I think you need to blame some of it on the demise of family values down the generations, peer pressure, society, sexual equality, the 'Sisterhood' the ladette culture etc-etc. I see young+ girls openly urinating or engaging in sex acts in the park at the bottom of my garden, in shop doorways etc (I think you get the picture) & this is in daylight, then there's the fighting, getting pi$$3d & puking everywhere - - - it is known that more females than males are arrested for drunk & disorderly conduct these days, they seem to have no shame.
I could go on - - but - -.
Perhaps this book you read should be introduced into the school curriculum for girls. (now awaiting a visit from the sexual equality board) but then that would be shot to hell, when parents dress their little 4yr old girls up sexually with playboy branded outfits & the like, then would up in arms complain if they attracted the attention of the local perv or where sexually active. Anyway - - back to your posting - - -
>>I FEEL as if all guys are the same<< Same could be said for women, but no we're NOT - - are we?.
>>some are soo interested in you and will do anything to be near you for one minute and the next, they don't like you;<< Yes, that is about 60% true, with others it's called the 'thrill of the chase', yes we will work hard to get you, then when we do - - - some will 'relax' so to speak & feel we don't need to try so hard.
>>some will only be nice to you because they just want that one thing.<< Players are like that, can spend months working on a 'mark' if it's an advantage, (money, sex, power)
>>some will lie and believe they can get away with it;<< (That also goes both ways) But then isn't that down to - - Tolerance, (letting them get away with little lies) - -Stupidity, (allowing the lies to escalate without check, or he/she can change) or - - Low self esteem - - (but "he/she loves me really, that's what love is')
>>some just waste your time for attention bc they're either bored or lonely;<< True! But again - Both sexes are guilty of this.
As for your headline - - >>Do nice girls finish last? And do men really like b*tches?<< I & many others could 'ASK' the same thing. There are plenty of women who've broken a good mans heart or family up (sometimes abandoning the kids too) due to their actions. Men (rich & poor) who've worshiped the ground, treated them nice, only for them to go of with the local tattooed biker or the likes.
My ex (Claire) of 6yrs (I' knew her for many years earlier) while with me, kept her options open & started a relationship with an abusive drug taking ex con (arson & burglary) who still robs people & (allegedly) had/has a unhealthy interest in children because - she said - WAIT FOR IT - - "he can change, he deserves a second chance" (yes she enjoyed telling me & rubbing my nose in it), Karma though - - within a month of us parting, she was pregnant, engaged & married in that order, let herself go,gave up her law degree courses, then lost her job in a big law firm, unhappy in an abusive marriage, struggling to keep a roof over her head, self esteem back to square one etc. Believe it or not though, I still love her & worry about her (& daughter) - - but - - hey-ho.
But Yes! there are good people with morals & standards out there for us Nurse, (a bit like virgins - eh)? =0) - We - - - - - just - have to - - keep looking.
Best wishes.
Buy or Sell: David Fincher is the master of making the scariest non-horror films?
Q. Perhaps creepy would be a better word than scary, but regardless, I find that his films creep me out more than any horror film. The scene in Zodiac in the potential Zodiac killer's basement is suspense at it's finest, and The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo slowly gets freakier. Even his "lighter" films (The Social Network) have these dark atmospheres to them.
He's definitely one of my favorite filmmakers.
BQ: Does anybody really consider Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close, and War Horse to be better than The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo? If so, why?
He's definitely one of my favorite filmmakers.
BQ: Does anybody really consider Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close, and War Horse to be better than The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo? If so, why?
A. Absolutely agreed! I wouldn't go so far as to call him the "master" since I haven't seen every non-horror film to pass judgement. But definitely yeah, he's experimented lots too, but one thing's clear--he's never strayed away from the creepy atmospheric feel every movie of his has. I completely agree with you on that. Fincher’s films have been about the pathologies of men. From Fight Club to Zodiac to Se7en, he looked at the darker side of their nature, he’s reveled in it. He even managed to make a movie about Facebook’s founder feel creepy, urgent, and disturbing. But not since he directed Sigourney Weaver in Alien3 and now, Rooney Mara; has his “dangerous pit bull” been a woman. I've seen Girl With the Dragon Tattoo and it's got everything you expect from a Fincher-movie. I preferred the Swedish version, but Fincher did justice to the Millennium book, so I can't complain (apart from the ending change).
He's one of my favourite filmmakers too. If anything I'd call him a perfectionist, because of the number of 'takes' he does to perfect a scene. I think it's brilliant when someone takes their work very seriously not "take one, ok that's done let's pack up and leave". He strives to entertain, with every frame in each film. Can't help but admire him. :)
BQ: War Horse and ELIC do not deserve to be on the list of "Best Motion Picture", period. Heck yes, The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo was better! Hell, Drive, Shame, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows 2, Rise of the Planet of the Apes-- were all better and had more "meat" than War...and ELIC. I'm sorry, but I simply don't get the ELIC nom. I get the usual Spielberg recognition in the category (if it's not best director, then best film), I'm not against nominating the usual "veterans" if their movies were genuinely good. I mean, Fincher at least deserved a best director nod. And Scorsese tried his hand in 2 new genres he was completely unfamiliar with 3D and kids. At least he tried to push the envelope. I'm sorry if I'm being a bit harsh, but Spielberg staunchly insists on finding a happy ending even in the calamity of the First World War, but that he slathers it on so thick and leaves so soft an impression. It has the usual Spielberg customary flair but never reaches greatness due to it being syrupy and proudly sentimental. It's like when you have a kid that keeps getting A* at a essay, but then gets a B and he wonders why? It's because on his standards, he could've been better, been more innovative, pushed some boundries. Spielberg's that kid. I know I didn't really answer the BQ very well, lol. I just get mad when I think about War Horse and remember how amazing so many other movies were and deserve some recognition and praise for their hard work :/
He's one of my favourite filmmakers too. If anything I'd call him a perfectionist, because of the number of 'takes' he does to perfect a scene. I think it's brilliant when someone takes their work very seriously not "take one, ok that's done let's pack up and leave". He strives to entertain, with every frame in each film. Can't help but admire him. :)
BQ: War Horse and ELIC do not deserve to be on the list of "Best Motion Picture", period. Heck yes, The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo was better! Hell, Drive, Shame, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows 2, Rise of the Planet of the Apes-- were all better and had more "meat" than War...and ELIC. I'm sorry, but I simply don't get the ELIC nom. I get the usual Spielberg recognition in the category (if it's not best director, then best film), I'm not against nominating the usual "veterans" if their movies were genuinely good. I mean, Fincher at least deserved a best director nod. And Scorsese tried his hand in 2 new genres he was completely unfamiliar with 3D and kids. At least he tried to push the envelope. I'm sorry if I'm being a bit harsh, but Spielberg staunchly insists on finding a happy ending even in the calamity of the First World War, but that he slathers it on so thick and leaves so soft an impression. It has the usual Spielberg customary flair but never reaches greatness due to it being syrupy and proudly sentimental. It's like when you have a kid that keeps getting A* at a essay, but then gets a B and he wonders why? It's because on his standards, he could've been better, been more innovative, pushed some boundries. Spielberg's that kid. I know I didn't really answer the BQ very well, lol. I just get mad when I think about War Horse and remember how amazing so many other movies were and deserve some recognition and praise for their hard work :/
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